Monday Musing.

Beth went down to Illinois yesterday, leaving me on my own in the house until Thursday. I did what I always do when I get the house to myself, spend a couple of hours watching what I want on the TV, eat snacks, fall sleep, and then wake up, over-full, wondering when Beth and Abbey will be back. Thursday, got it.
I was going to write that I haven't  really seen anyone over the weeks since I got back,  with my manky ankle knackering me going out much. This isn't true, I have seen people since I got back. My issue is what it always is, MS means I live my life as a blip on the radar. When I'm around people, I always enjoy the company and have a good time. What I can't do, is be around consistently. I get wiped out all the time, lose weeks, months and last year, most of the year.
 I'm still around, and have fun when I can.
I'm finally getting better at dealing with my enforced stops, though not perfect. I still see time slip away, and do fuck all about it, except read , change the channels, or stream more radio from England. I am over feeling guilty for not doing what everyone else does. I felt lazy for years. I was wrong about that. Truth is, if I was well, I'd still be doing exactly what I wanted,  and getting paid performing as much as I could. i was never slightly interested in a proper job, which I know means I never got to build daily work relationships. No bad thing, as my tolerance for bullshit is nil, and I don't think I would have done too well.
Is that a rationale, for being really sick and unable to be normal? Probably. Fuck it, Up really early having coma'ed yesterday out. Coffee, a banana,  and Radio 6. Tunes!