That was a week.

Beth left for Chicago last weekend.  Her and her Dad are up there while her mum is in hospital. She's doing a lot better today, a slow recovery is what's needed.
This left me in charge of Abbey and our neighbours dog Rudy for a week. They are great dogs,no trouble at all. Just as well as I spent the week in an MS winter coma. I didn't leave the house until Saturday, pushed out the door to go to an MS yoga class by the realization I had been watching Netflix for way too long. When you find yourself in front of Buck Rogers wondering if it and the old Battlestar Galactica used the same sets, its time to leave the house. Yoga was great. Very helpful as my new flexitarian diet thing took a bit of a tank when Yury came to my house thursday bearing donuts and a bottle of Kroger cherry cola.
Today, went for breakfast with John Feather who I hadn't seen for ages. It was somewhat epic as we extended breakfast until the looks and growing queue drove us out the door. We then started walking, both under the impression we were following the other one. Nice walk, wrong way.
Got home, Fran and Paul came to get Rudy. Went over to their house and had a very nice dinner and a lot of gin. Home now a little saner having seen actual humans and left the house. MS is shit, but it is quite funny.

Net

Up with the dogs. Weather crap, unless you need ice for a gin and tonic and your freezer has packed up. Radio 5 streaming, with theAustralian Open binging back and forth. Dogs prone in the front room, looking at me as if the cold is my fault. It is my fault, we should be living in Hawaii.

Two dogs, no telly.

Its me , abbey and Rudy, our neighbour's pooch who we are babysitting while they are in Aruba. Fran and Paul go there every year, which makes a ton of sense to me. Winter is shit, and long here in Ice Station Columbus. I originally found it amazing, we don't get winter's like this in England, though everyone back home tells me this years is terrible. Is it going to last until April?  This is the question I ask myself over here every year, and it does. Having said that the two or three days of perfect weather a year are great.
You can tell when its really cold, the dogs stand at the open kitchen door, look at each other, look at you to say," You're kidding, right?" Before heading back off to the couch, where they lie while you  stand shivering at the door like a super keen substitute teacher, trying to get everyone involved. Dogs will do this in good weather, even rain, but arctic conditions? Couch. Enjoy yourself stupid human.
Telly sits, a menacing ancient obelisk, scanning the front room with its one giant dead eye. I've been watching a lot of Netflix on my laptop. Its like when me and my brother got our first black and white portable, only no dial. when you had a dial telly, and the storm was up, you believed you might be able to pick up TV from the continent. Now there are loads of foreign channels on sky back home, no one really wants them. Unless its late night ropey french TV.

Table.

This afternoon a super honest repairman told us that it was time to let our TV rest in peace. You would have thought  this would be the worst news ever. In fact it was the best thing that could have happened. All of a sudden Beth and I are eating our meals at the table, not scoffing in front of the telly, from plates wedged on our laps, watching for  the dog, who is watching us to drop any morsel at all. She's still in luck,  I drop enough food to make circling worth her while. It was weird at first, two people, two plates, quiet. Turns out we have loads to say to each other, outside of worrying about how CSI New York are going to solve the case. We are of course discussing getting another TV. But not for a while.

Weekend.

After a heavy Friday I went to an MS yoga class on Saturday. Its new and I wandered in to hide in the corner for an hour and a half. This was scuppered by the fact that Jen, the teacher and I were the only one's there. Weather and a flat tire prevented anyone else attending. sounds like a nightmare, it was actually excellent. Jen has been teaching MS yoga for a while, and she really understands what works to try and get your body working again. That, and she's always looking for new ways to move us forward. I was lucky to get a one to one lesson from her, slightly hungover as I was. Came home and continued blasting my way through Battlestar Galactica on Netflix. Having no telly for two weeks addicted me to watching series on my tiny laptop screen. turns out it was rather good.
sunday. Finished Battlestar, Beth and I went to Trader Joe's and Whole foods to buy the new foods which are slowly starting to make sense on our flexitarian diet. Turns out you can have meat, as long as you have lots of beans and vegetables. Turns out you don't have that much meat, and the faintly worrying looking veggies thing sare  actually really good. And you poo properly. Did I mention that?

YMCA'd

Beth and I went to the Y downtown. She went off to the gym, I went to change. I span the numbers fruitlessly on my locker for 10 minutes. Went out got the instructions. Back in, failed again. Back with a sweaty bloke, who also failed. Back in with the male captain of the lockers. Nice old duffer who informed me that I hadn't paid for a while. Locker emptied . Ended up chatting to a really nice woman, getting my stuff back in a bin bag, then re-organising the locker.  Chatted to someone on the desk whose boyfriend is from Essex. Left the Y with my gymly goods in a bin bag. This took an hour, which is how long we were going for. Much more fun than you'd think.

Year starts

Jan 14th 2011

Today i woke up and realised I was remotely on the ball. Not perfectly, I have a high dose of fuck-uppery which runs rampant through my veins. Today I didn't wake up waiting for it to get dark. 

This is a huge symptom of MS in the winter. I think people with MS should get a hibernation option for the snowy cold months. That or our own temperate island, we can limp around in peace. If it sounds all gloomy and sorry for myself, don't get me wrong. I'm grinning a lot typing this.

MS can be fascinating. It steals time, and it makes me forget what actually was achieved. Then, from nowhere, it lets me remember, as a neural pathway reconnects itself.

It began to happen while Beth and I were shopping in Whole Foods last sunday. The melee of smells which fought for dominance began to spark memories. Of parks and walks and good times with friends. All of which I had, not forgotten, but had difficulty remembering. 

There are a ton of other things I can't remember clearly, though I know they exist. Like reaching for an elusive word, which is there, but not quite. I know at some point those pathways will clear. I don't know when, but I look forward to them coming back. You can tell if its happening, I stop still as the memories rush back in. I used to be terrified those memories would be gone forever. Turns out, they are just sulking, sat behind a scar in my brain, while my nose helps them figure out a route to get back.

The time thing I can't solve. The only thing to do with that is to let go of time lost and use that which is available. Easier written than done, but to honest flailing internally against an opponent you can't beat, and no one but you is fully aware of, is a waste of time. It also turns you into a selfish self regarding twat. My apologies to anyone who has been swiped by this, I shall endeavour to do better. I have a horrible feeling I've written that before. Obviously I need to smell something pertinent. some humble horse shit most likely.