Current mood: archivist
Category: archivist Life
" Sorry about your mothers back, she fucking moved while I was shaving her...."
Brendon Burns At a seminary college gig in Oxford.
"I'm fucking Jimi Hendrix I am."
Noel James stuffing a mike into the speakers, fucked off at the posh kids at a ball in Cambridge. Then randomly bought on then girlfriend Harriet Bowden insisting, "She's posh like you, you'll like her..."
"You keep bringing them, I'll keep burying you...."
Natalie Haynes, at the underground bar gig in West Hampstead.
"Lets put our hands together, and pray for a better gig next week..." Mark Lammar after a nightmare compere.
"Dear Captain Cash, please send me 100 quid so I don't have to do that gig in Greenwich, where act after act goes on and dies on their arse....."
Ian Cognito bad Sunday night at Up the Creek.
"Do you ever find yourself slumped into front of porn on the telly, haagen daaz and vodka splayed in front of you, weeping at how shit your life turned out?"
Liz Webb Screaming Blue at the dog and fox in wimbledon. Still one of the best lines I've ever heard.
"The reason we keep booking you Si, is for the moment you say 'The reason this gig isn't working is threefold..." and then you tear the room to pieces. Hilarious." Said to me by The Cot Death Kid and Ian Bass when I asked why they kept paying me good money to come and tank their rough-house gigs.
That was Simon Dowd. lovely boy, might be a bit ill." Jo Caulfield at Screaming Blue in Hemel after I'd done 25 minutes of stuff that made absolutely no sense whatsoever.
'The acoustics in there are rubbish. You can't hear them laughing...." A comic who shall remain nameless
More as they occur to me
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