Party like its 1993 (fuck)

Tuesday, May 12, 2009


Current mood:acceptance
When I say party like its 1993 ,I mean the year just previous to me knowing what the fuck was going on. Maybe it was earlier? Fuck who cares, this is what happened.
I was gigging, still sharing with my mate Neil when I started to have spasms down my eight hand side, pretty constantly. I gigged on this and remember being on stage at the Hampstead comedy club,in front of a very close up audience and hitting a spasm as I walked on. It was quite amazing relly, the audince didn't know if it was part of the act, and my follow up of 5 minutes on what you think of during a CAT scan (sex) and how trying to stop this is how brain aneurysums occur, confused them all the more.

I mention this because thats whats been going on. Its weird. I can barely functon in the day, am kept up by the twitching then can't function the next day. I haven't talked to people back home about it as I can't really talk.

If I haven't returned a call, for once, it actually is not you. It is me.

The spasms are backing off a bit but I don't know what it means. I know Beth is very patient. This crap has been coming for a couple of years.

I know this. MS is a fucking bastard and I hate its guts.

Thing is when it gets bad I cut everyone off and head for the depths of my brain, the one place I definitely shouldn't be living. After years of this you would think I would of worked this out.

So I intend to chill a lot. Anyone I haven't been in touch with, my apologies....